#tldr: they could never make me ship you miason. alimia

[whitestopper]

This is an old thread but I will say that Mia did actually tell Alison and Will that she didn't want anything elaborate, just something chill. So it's not even that Mia didn't make her wishes clear and they were working blindly (which is a recurring situation in the show), she does this time and they don't take it seriously. And granted, they likely have different definitions to Mia regarding what is/isn't elaborate or chill, but after the events of the first party and the house party, I can't help but think that putting Mia in an environment with lots of people and alcohol is obviously not a good idea.

I think this idea of "Alison is not self-centred because she keeps prioritising Mia" is kind of missing the point because in Alison's pursuit to be Mia's no. 1, she is actually being self-centered. From episode 1, she inserts herself into the group despite a lukewarm (if not cold) reaction, and here is her first interaction with Mia:

Alison: Mia! I didn't know you were back today.

Mia: Uh, yeah. I guess it was time to-

Alison: Great, great! (sits down)

Alison then proceeded to be insensitive towards Mia - looking for details about her stay in the mental hospital, comparing Mia's anorexia to an (exaggerated) anecdote about Polos - and at the party, she puts pressure on Mia to have three shots despite Mia being on medication. And obviously she's not being malicious when she does this, but her intentions don't change the fact that she continues to make Mia (and her friends) uncomfortable and even puts Mia's recovery at risk.

The moments where Alison does help Mia doesn't mean that as a whole she's a good girlfriend or even a good friend to Mia, not when they're interwoven with moments where she doesn't help Mia or actively makes things worse. If Alison is really paying close attention to Mia (and had a healthy understanding about Mia's boundaries), then she'd pick up on the fact that Mia doesn't really like her (and perhaps trust that Mia's close friends might be a better support than she can be), but she's idealised Mia in a way that she needs to be Mia's champion, which of course blows up in her face when she asserts that self-image in an Instagram post.

Alison really liking Mia and Alison being a deeply self-centered person who didn’t see how the party she threw for her girlfriend neither had anyone Mia knew and made her supremely uncomfortable can, and do, coexist in the show.

Mia being a difficult person to be friends with and Mia trying to do the right thing can and do coexist in said show.

Alison being a good girlfriend but ultimately not paying attention to what makes Mia comfortable and Alison absolutely deserving better can and do coexist in the show.

Carli and Cam using each other to get over the person they actually like and Carli and Mia’s kiss hurting Cam can and do coexist in the show.

Theo feeling absolutely smothered to constantly be the only one their parents don’t worry about and Theo wanting to protect his older sister and be there for her can and do coexist.